Ultimate burgers

Yesterday's bacon post, especially some of the later comments, got me thinking:

How would you make the ULTIMATE burger?  Describe your ultimate in the comments, where I will begin with the burgers I made over the weekend...

Comments

[Gullyborg]

started with a basic hamburger patty, cooked with a little worcestershire sauce and grill seasoning.

while that was cooking, sauteed some diced sweet onions and sliced elephant garlic in butter, with some garlic-infused olive oil, seasoned salt, worcestershire sauce, and tawny port -- with a dash of brown sugar and balsamic vinegar to help caramelization.

meanwhile, took a portabello mushroom cap, properly cleaned and trimmed, and seared it good on both sides in some hot bacon grease, with a sprinkle of salt to help draw out the extra liquid... yes, the hot bacon grease implies bacon was also made!

then, just before the cooking was complete, crumbled bleu cheese went into the onions, to heat up just enough to get the cheese a little melty - to act as a binder.

meanwhile, potato buns were toasted and buttered.

assembly:

bottom bun, burger, bacon, onion-cheese mixture, portabello, stoneground mustard with horseradish, top bun.

served with a bottle of Belgian porter.

[Sakaki]

I'll take that burger, but I will add...a SECOND burger, and a SECOND layer of bacon.

and I'll take a bottle of JOLT cola instead of the belgian porter.

[HMIL]

My needs are simple - burger seasoned with onion soup mix, yummy ketchup, plain yellow mustard, a slice of walla walla sweet onion, a little iceburg lettuce ... and smashed down so it will fit in my mouth (hard to open it wide enough 'cause of TMJ surgery back in '91). Pair that with a pint of Berry Burst Cider from BJ's (on Coburg Road in Eugene) and then give me someplace where I can put my feet up and read in the shade with a gentle breeze.

Ahhhh. See? Simple.

[Bob]

Take one steer.

Raise on clean pasture for 16 - 20 months.

About two weeks prior to "the end" supplement with 4 pounds of apples per day, and replace the animals water with rosemary tea. Alternatively, dice the apples and mix with about 1/2 cup rosemary needles.

Slaughter the steer, clean and hang the carcass in a cool humidity controlled place for 3 to 4 weeks.

Process carcass. Along with all those yummy steaks, roasts, ribs, bones, and offal cuts, you'll get about 350 pounds of very lean hamburger.

Put the hamburger in 1 or 2-pound bags. Place in deep-freeze.

The day before burger time, remove as much as you'll need for the freezer and place in the fridge.

REMEMBER This is LEAN (about 2%) stuff so mix in some tallow or olive oil before grilling.

Grill

Serve with whatever.

[Gullyborg]

plain yellow mustard is NOT a condiment.

[BobG]

The best mustard is either brown, with horseradish, or with jalepenos.

[Sakaki]

Chinese Brown Ground Mustard. That's the only way to go.